Liturgy: “The Nagging Feeling that We Haven’t Measured Up”
I imagine that many of you also struggle with drivenness and goal-oriented desire. It's a deeply twenty-first century problem.
What is the King’s Liturgy? King’s Liturgy defines our experience together as a Christian community. It outlines the rhythms we celebrate with the Church at large: Scripture readings, Sabbath habits, and celebration of Holy Days and historical events.
This Week’s Lectionary Readings
Acts 4:5-12
1 John 3:16-24
John 10:11-18
Psalm 23
This week’s liturgy is contributed by Benjamin White, assistant professor of Biblical studies (starting fall 2018):
One of my favourite places is England’s Lake District. It’s not far from Durham—where I’ve been completing a Ph.D. in Theology—so my wife and I have made it our refuge from life’s trials. The picturesque villages, winding roads, and sheep-dotted hills make you feel like you’ve entered the real-life version of Tolkien’s Middle Earth.
The charm of the Lakes was recently captured by James Rebanks’ bestseller The Shepherd’s Life, which provides a window into Cumbrian sheep-farming. As you might imagine, Rebanks dispels the romantic notions of farming that have developed in our increasingly urban world. Being a shepherd is a grimy job, which is important to recall as we reflect on one of our texts this week—Psalm 23—where David proclaims, “The Lord is my shepherd” (v. 1).
Starting with David’s initial proclamation, the Psalm runs through the gamut of shepherding tasks: providing rest and food (v. 2a), drink (v. 2b), protection (v. 4a), and guidance (v. 4b). But even if we try to think like sheep farmers—as many resources on Psalm 23 want us to do—there is an unsettling sense in which this Psalm eludes us. It’s clear that David uses shepherding as an analogy for God’s pastoral care, but what are we supposed to do about it? I think we can get more out of this Psalm if we pay as much attention to the second clause as the first: “The Lord is my Shepherd, I shall not want“(v. 1).
This well-known statement might sound like a challenge to be totally Stoic. But it’s clear that David wants many things. He acts as a helpless sheep who, above all, wants to dwell in the house of the Lord forever (v. 6). Some translations capture David’s intent by rendering v. 1 as “The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing”‘. In other words, the Psalm highlights how God’s character and actions are the source of all true contentment. It is because God cares for us (v. 1-3), even accompanies us through our darkest valleys (v. 4), that we do not need to live in a spirit of fear, shame, and constant striving. But the ordering of our affections is easier said than done!
When I was in graduate school to prepare for my Ph.D., I worked hard to achieve top grades. I would study day and night, until I couldn’t work anymore. I repeatedly told myself that I was keeping this schedule because God was directing me to train for a life of serving others. But my wife still remembers the day that convocation awards were released. I cried, ‘What do they mean by “I didn’t get the Biblical Studies Award”!?’ I had completed my master’s degree, attained good grades, been accepted to a desirable Ph.D. program, and yet I was shattered that someone beat my GPA by mere decimal points.
I imagine that many of you also struggle with drivenness and goal-oriented desire. It’s a deeply twenty-first century problem. By being granted more opportunities than ever before, we tend to dream of achievements and possessions that rival the imagination. As we are influenced by the glamour of our peers’ social media profiles and ridiculously long CVs, there is also a nuance to our achievements: the nagging feeling that we haven’t measured up to the expectations of others, ourselves, and even God himself.
This is where the Word of God speaks into our lives through the words of a shepherd-King: you can have ambition—desires are good—but only in the service of following God (e.g. Acts 4.12). There is a big difference between working to make yourself look great and working to serve God. Both involve effort, skill, and sacrifice; but only one of them includes joy, which serves as an excellent summary of the experiences David receives as he follows God. So ask yourself: am I setting goals and working to serve God (cf. 1 Jn. 3.16-17), or am I doing this for the sake of self-satisfaction? A key indicator will often be whether we work out of a spirit of comfort and joy, or one of fear and pride.
But lest we fail, Psalm 23 depicts God entering our disgrace and fully redeeming us. One of the lessons I’ve gained from becoming a father is how easily a new baby can get upset: the soother slips from his mouth, a stranger glances at him in the wrong way, or he simply doesn’t know where we are in the apartment. My wife and I comfort our son, trying to show that we will be there for him when life takes a wrong turn. I think that God is a lot like this, except he transcends my comforting abilities by sending Jesus, “the good Shepherd”, who lays down his life for his sheep (Jn 10.11). Christ restores joy to our lives, possibly not in the way we hoped, but always with love and mercy. So be bold, make big plans, and do not forget the words of William Carey: “Expect great things from God, attempt great things for God.”